Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Goals & the Art of Being Un-Inspirational

I’m not good at being inspirational. You may have already figured that out if you’ve either a) known me longer than five minutes or b) spent more than five minutes looking at this blog.
There are some people I’ve had the pleasure of knowing who have gift of inspiring others. Being in their presence has caused me to run faster or write more or solve a problem more creatively. Inspiring others truly is a gift.
One I definitely don’t have.
If my dear mother would not have a heart-attack, I think I would decorate my entire house with these type posters because I think they're hilarious: (these are the “Demotivator” series from a Company called Despair, Inc.  Their motto – “Motivational products don’t work – But our Demotivators products don’t work even better” is awesome. I’m thinking of applying for a job with them.)

It's always darkest just before
it goes pitch black.


Believe in Yourself -
because the rest of us think
you're an idiot

[As an aside, in grad school one night, I snuck into the PhD computer lab and took down all the inspirational posters and put up ones just like these. You should’ve seen the brouhaha that ensued because of that little escapade. I still have the scathing letter someone taped to one of my masterpieces.  Called me very unkind words like: immature, and (gasp!)… cynical.]
Okay, so we've determined I am un-inspirational. It's an art. BUT I told you all that because I’m going to take a moment here and try to be... well, not inspiring necessarily, but at least not be uninspiring.  Bear with me, this'll probably be awkward. 
If you’re like me, you had a group of “intentions” when 2012 began. Not resolutions, mind you, because no one keeps their resolutions. But we had goals for 2012.
How are your 2012 goals going so far?
INSPIRATION ATTEMPT ALERT: Do you have a goal that has fallen by the wayside since January 1st? Well, you're in luck: today is "National Get Back on Track With Your Goals" Day. (I would call it NGBTWYG Day but that looks like some strange mix of LGBT and NKOTB)
And the even better news is, if you miss it today, tomorrow is ALSO National Get Back on Track With Your Goals day. So is EVERYDAY in February! And March! April, May, June! And so on...
So pick it up, dust it off, and makes some steps towards accomplishing your goal TODAY. Not just some random time this week, but today.
Was your goal to lose 20 lbs this year? Then walk/run one mile today. To write a book? Write 1000 words today. To be more engaged with your kids? Read them one short story. To be awesome?  Buy your wife flowers just because it’s Tuesday.
Or maybe you didn’t make any goals at the turn of the year. Then it's time to make one now. It’s not too late. And there's an extra day in February this year, so you can make up for any lost time in January.
So get out there and try not to suck! Win one for the Gipper and all that stuff. See, I told you being uninspirational is an art.


  1. That was brilliantly and erm, unconventionally inspirational!

    Also, for that demotivational stunt you pulled in varsity, you earn my undying respect and this black heart ♥ of Forever Being Awesome. Wear it with pride. :D

    1. The black heart of Forever Being Awesome??!!??

      I would first like to thank the Awesomeness Academy for their thoughtful consideration and ability to not suck...

  2. "get out there and try not to suck!" Best. Advice. EVER. :)

  3. Your blog is a keeper. Can't wait to see Calamity Jane in my in-box.

  4. Yes! I will try not to suck.
    Very funny blog :o)

  5. Never let it be said that my advice does not motivate. :)

  6. Melanie here! I enjoyed this piece, please email me--I have a question about your blog. MelanieLBowen[at]gmail[dot]com