"Focusing" on a New Year

I was trying to find FB posts today from my friends and family on their New Year Resolutions and was shocked to find that almost everyone has come out and said that  they are against making New Years Resolutions.

How everybody pretty much feels about New Years Resolutions:

I hear ya. It's pretty easy to start listing all the things we're going to do, but with no real plan of action of how to accomplish them. So we begin the year all gung-ho and make it for about five weeks on sheer determination before real life becomes too hard and we putter out. It's happened to me many times.

So it seems that since New Year Resolutions have become synonymous with starting a goal only to quit a few weeks later, people have decided not to make goals at all.

I'm not sure that's really a good thing... but that's for another post.

I too am not making any real New Years Resolutions this year. But a friend of mine, Delores Fossen, a highly successful (USA Today bestselling) author for Intrigue, and mentor to many of us Intrigue newbies, mentioned that although she doesn't make New Years Resolutions, she does try to pick a word that she uses to guide her year. Here's what she said:

Last year my word was ENJOY, as in taking time to smell the roses. This year, it's FEARLESS because I want to try some things with traveling and writing that I don't usually try.

She encouraged us to come up with a word of our own. I think that idea is fabulous. So what's my word?  

FOCUS.

I can already see, based on it having been 2014 for fifteen hours already, that this year is going to be crazy for me.

Part of the craziness:
Writing and editing four books in eight months - check.
Training for an Ironman triathlon - check.
Raising four kids, one of whom has become a teenager, and is already wanting a tattoo - check and #@$%!.

Just to get through 2014 successfully -- based on commitments I've already made, I'm going to need to have a great deal of focus (and probably Xanax). There's not going to be as much time available for non-essential activities and people as there has been in the past.

And that's okay.

I'm ready to make better (and sometimes harder) choices about where to put my time and energy this year. I'm choosing to give my undivided time and attention to the people and activities that I know are important. And cutting the rest loose, at least for a while.

Focusing on the good, not the bad. Focusing on strengths, not on weaknesses. Focusing on who and what is important. And letting the rest go.

It's kind of like this:

(Which, by the way, was not said by the Greek philosopher Socrates but by a gas attendant named Socrates in the 1980 book Way of the Peaceful Warrior. But whatever, it's still true.)


New year. New focus. I'm ready.

Goals & the Art of Being Un-Inspirational

I’m not good at being inspirational. You may have already figured that out if you’ve either a) known me longer than five minutes or b) spent more than five minutes looking at this blog.

There are some people I’ve had the pleasure of knowing who have gift of inspiring others. Being in their presence has caused me to run faster or write more or solve a problem more creatively. Inspiring others truly is a gift.

One I definitely don’t have.

If my dear mother would not have a heart-attack, I think I would decorate my entire house with these type posters because I think they're hilarious: (these are the “Demotivator” series from a Company called Despair, Inc.  Their motto – “Motivational products don’t work – But our Demotivators products don’t work even better” is awesome. I’m thinking of applying for a job with them.)



It's always darkest just before
it goes pitch black.



                   

Believe in Yourself -
because the rest of us think
you're an idiot

 

[As an aside, in grad school one night, I snuck into the PhD computer lab and took down all the inspirational posters and put up ones just like these. You should’ve seen the brouhaha that ensued because of that little escapade. I still have the scathing letter someone taped to one of my masterpieces.  Called me very unkind words like: immature, and (gasp!)… cynical.]

Okay, so we've determined I am un-inspirational. It's an art. BUT I told you all that because I’m going to take a moment here and try to be... well, not inspiring necessarily, but at least not be uninspiring.  Bear with me, this'll probably be awkward. 

If you’re like me, you had a group of “intentions” when 2012 began. Not resolutions, mind you, because no one keeps their resolutions. But we had goals for 2012.

How are your 2012 goals going so far?

INSPIRATION ATTEMPT ALERT: Do you have a goal that has fallen by the wayside since January 1st? Well, you're in luck: today is "National Get Back on Track With Your Goals" Day. (I would call it NGBTWYG Day but that looks like some strange mix of LGBT and NKOTB)

And the even better news is, if you miss it today, tomorrow is ALSO National Get Back on Track With Your Goals day. So is EVERYDAY in February! And March! April, May, June! And so on...

So pick it up, dust it off, and makes some steps towards accomplishing your goal TODAY. Not just some random time this week, but today.

Was your goal to lose 20 lbs this year? Then walk/run one mile today. To write a book? Write 1000 words today. To be more engaged with your kids? Read them one short story. To be awesome?  Buy your wife flowers just because it’s Tuesday.

Or maybe you didn’t make any goals at the turn of the year. Then it's time to make one now. It’s not too late. And there's an extra day in February this year, so you can make up for any lost time in January.

So get out there and try not to suck! Win one for the Gipper and all that stuff. See, I told you being uninspirational is an art.

Beware of Running Zombies... in tutus?

Tomorrow I head to South Florida for a 200-mile relay race. It’s part of the Ragnar Relay series – a company which holds these type races all over the country. I am part of a 12-person team, with one of my best girlfriends, Meg, an old high-school buddy, Vinnie, and ten other people I have never met . We are running from Miami to Key West – each person running 3 legs of 5-10 miles.

This is my second Ragnar Relay. My first was in September of last year, an all-women’s team called, “Does this Tutu Make Me Look Fast?”  Evidently it did, because we took third place. For the Key West race though, I have moved to the other end of the spectrum – from Tutus to Zombies. My team this weekend is “ZombiesAreEverywhere.com” (yeah, corporate sponsor… so what? We sold out to the man… er, dead person.)



 Team Tutu in DC after 200 miles...

   

Team Zombie after 200 miles?



I love the Ragnar races. They force you to run under circumstances you would rarely choose: in the middle of the night, along unfamiliar paths, with a bunch of strangers, while you are undernourished and overtired. It’s different and exciting and hard.  And I love it. As a matter of fact, just a few days ago I posted on Twitter my best memory of 2011 was “Running 7 miles down an unfamiliar road by myself in the fog & rain at 3 o'clock in the morning - in a tutu.”

Ragnar is kind of “Hard Running Meets Block Party.”  And it’s great because everyone there is as crazy as you. So I’m excited about this adventure to start off 2012. Also, did I mention Key West? Don’t worry, I’ll have a mojito for each of you.

No One Will Remember But Me

Ah, the beginning of a new year. I imagine, just like me, there are people all over the country who are beginning blogs today, convinced they have something witty or fascinating to say that others want to read. Like the old saying goes:

Dance as if nobody’s watching
Love like you’ve never been hurt
Blog as if the world finds you as entertaining as you find yourself…

Or something like that.

So here it is, the start of 2012. I have a blog readership of zero. I imagine by the end of 2012 – if we’re all here despite Mayan Calendar predictions – I may have a readership of two. My mother (obliged to read by giving birth to me nearly four decades ago) and my friend Stephanie (the kindest soul on the face of the planet). Any more than that I’ll just assume people got lost on their way to the blog they were really trying to find.

But here’s my thought for today. A quote from the Rick Springfield (yes, the guy who sang Jesse’s Girl in the 80s):

“I never could settle for where I was –
Too many places I was trying to be.
The times I’ve succeeded and the times I’ve failed
No one will remember but me.”

It’s a line from a great song called World Start Turning. I don’t need to wax poetic about the meaning of the quote – it’s pretty obvious. But it contains a lot of truth for me: this year, I want to be content where I am and be emotionally invested with the people in my real life. And most importantly I want to be willing to let both my successes and my failures slip from my grasp easily in order to keep moving forward, rather than clutching them to me and carrying their weight. Their weight is too heavy and my journey is still too far.

2012. And so it begins...